Hitting the Wall

[jaegamer]

I made this graphic, inspired by this cartoon from Something*Positive (warning, NSF language), as a representation of having hit the wall, hard today, with regards to gaming. Which is, as most of you probably know, the general center of my life.

If you're feeling constructive, feel free to offer ideas on re-energizing in the comments.

Also an icon, if you want to nab it for your own LJ.

Below is an extended whine...

It may be the lack of chemicals talking (been off my antidepressant for 3 weeks to prep for a narcolepsy test), but all of a sudden I have just lost the ability to care about any of the games or campaigns I'm involved in. Or the club. I usually care passionately, but suddenly I'm all meh.

As a coordinator for the Dave Arneson's Blackmoor campaign, I'm supposed to go to Orlando for MegaCon in March, but after another round of the Ego that Ate the Southeast, I am dreading it. Why should I spend a significant sum of money to go do something that makes my stomach knot up? For the most part the scenarios have taken a very wargamist/strategic turn,and I'd rather gouge my eyes out with a dull spoon than run 4 hours of pointless combat. Or even 4 hours of combat with a point. Do. Not. Want. And not a good mental framework for someone helping with the heavy lifting of making a campaign run.

As for the club... every month it's the same struggle to get people to step up and pull part of the load, and I just don't know if I've got it in me any more. There are a few people who do step up - I don't want to sell them short - but I'm pretty confident that if I were to walk away it'd fall apart. Last time I did (to run Living Force) the club had 6 members when I returned... I wonder what would happen if I didn't stand for re-election as President this time? Would I be able to stand it?

Meh. Maybe the world will look better tomorrow, or someone will have a brilliant way to re-energize this bunny.

Comments

[yeopard.livejournal.com]

I've found that when I hit the wall it's best to take a step back and rest for a while. That's the best way to re-energize. Call a 'holiday' for the club for a month or two. The people who currently play will come back. Real life always has to come first. I can't step up at the moment because I have 2 cats in dire straights that need me home more and more. As it is, I've had to cut back to 1 slot at any given game day because one of them needs meds 3x/day and I can't do it when I'm away for that long. Regardless, you efforts and Patricks are appreciated and noted by everyone. That being said, the club members are adults and as adults they have to realize that things can't always go their way. Meaning, if they don't step up to help and the games don't run, they are partially responsible. If they get upset, they have to either step up or stop complaining.

When things settle back down for me I'll be helping out and running again. In the meantime, if the games don't run, I can't complain because I'm part of the problem. I would hope that the others would be mature about it as well and realize that the handful of people who are doing all the work need a break and deserve one.

If you need to cancel the games this weekend, I know that at least those signed up for FWS and WH are mature enough to understand and certainly won't send you hate mail.

Sounds like you need to go to Florida to enjoy the beach and NOT Megacon. That's my 2¢ worth, for what it's worth. Take care of yourself, k? :)

[jaegamer.livejournal.com]

What I'm afraid of is that if nothing happens for a month or two, the club won't survive. Then what will I do when I do want to run or play something?

This weekend should be okay - Scott, Alex & Lisa L have all stepped up to cover Blackmoor, and I can do the others. I might just schedule one (WH or FWS) to run next month.

As for Florida and beach... not so much for me. I burn in about 15 minutes. :)

I hope the kitties feel better.